Gym etiquette, rules and guidlines

Rules, Guidlines, and Etiquette
1) Never wear under armour to the gym*....ever
2) No short shorts....i dont care if you were a runner in high school...or you need to do laundry
3) Never trust a "trainer" more out of shape than you....any dumbass can get a certification
4) Only equipment in which you've bled, drooled, or intensively sweat on, needs to be cleaned by the you
5) Yelling is obnoxious and uncalled for
6) If your fat....do cardio until you've elliminated cottage cheese legs, arms, ass, second chin
7) Only jump rope in a designated "no one can hear that shit hit the floor" area
8) If you notice someone going from 1 machine to another...ask if they are done or to work in. Dont assume they are completely finished and rearrange attachements**
9) Conversations with hot chicks are to be done when you can actually breathe or when blood can reach the rest of your limbs.
10) Never hesistate to ask something to some schmuck listening to his ipod (me included).... Rick Astleys "never gonna give you up" isnt going anywhere.
11) Feel free to get pumped before a big lift....as well as laugh at the facial features of others while lifting
12) If you have the Teen Wolf situation...cover your hairy arms!!
13) Legs are only important if your a professional athelete or wear shorts a lot
14) Never wear a jump suit or wear more than two of the same logos (unless you're sponsored by them)
15) Dont fill your damn water bottle when people are behind you.... use the golf rule
16) Never use a computer or cell phone while at the gym...business, your girlfriend, your kidnapped daughter can wait.
17) Any conversation, sex story, gossip, etc.. with a lifting buddy about his girlfriend, wife, or boss doesnt leave the gym
18) Any cigarette must be smoked at least 32 yards away from the gym entrance upon your exit 19) If your wearing boxers to the gym...save yourself some embarassment and keep legs down during al exercises.
20) Signing up for cardio machines is retarded....but dont be a dick a waste a treadmill by walking for 45 minutes
21) Time between sets should factor amount lifted, number of reps, and number of people eyeing up your machine.

*this applies to dudes only..if your a chick (and in good shape) wear whatever the F you want
**if working in...set weight back to where they were